How to Argue Yourself Happy

Intentional Living

Aug 8

There's something so simple about happiness that is always true but is hard to remember. We can hang motivational quotes and snippets around our house, on our desktop backgrounds, on sticky notes on the fridge, but ultimately there's nothing more reassuring than reading or re-reading a longer passage in a book or elsewhere.

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Let me get a little personal for a minute.

How I'm my own worst enemy

I am my own worst enemy. I put an incredible amount of pressure on myself to perform, to get results, and to work as hard as I can. It's to the point where it either prevents me from relaxing because I feel like I must always be getting things done, or it prevents me from even being able to start a project because of the intense paralyzing perfectionism I put on myself, consciously or subconsciously.

While my drive to grow my blog and my brand helps me propel forward and create massive project checklists that would make some people nauseous, it also can be debilitating.

I know I need to remember to recognize my accomplishments at any size instead of focusing on the bigger picture items that I didn't get to yet. And while I know this, I also find it easy to forget to focus on the positives.

You can argue yourself happy

When you're being hard on yourself or you find yourself making the worst out of situations by being negative, it's truly important to remember that you can change yourself. And the change you make in yourself can positively affect those around you.

Gretchen Rubin, author of The Happiness Project and Happier at Home, reminded me of this in the latest section I read called “Make The Positive Argument”. She talked about how she defaults to snapping at her husband and criticizing him.

Gretchen then goes to say that “people are very skillful at arguing a particular case,” but they can easily argue the opposite case as well.

Having a bad day or feeling really negative?

The small mental shifts that you can make around a situation can immediately lift your mood.

The happiness face-palm moments

I was journaling recently and was beating myself up for watching a ton of TV. It quickly tumbled down into the dangerous mindset of "you'll never be successful".

Then I turned my journal entry around and within a few sentences of recognizing my recent accomplishments, I felt the change. I wrote:

“It’s insane how changing your output changes your mood. As I started to write positive things I could feel my spirit lifting. MUH”

The “MUH” being absolute frustration at how easily I forget that I make my own happiness.

Feed yourself inspirational happiness quotes

Search for happiness on Pinterest and you're smacked in the face with beautifully designed quotes and uplifting messages. There are so many that you can start to feel like Oprah is hitting you over the head with a happiness bat.

But there's a reason there are so many happiness pins. And there's a reason why so many people pin them over and over again.

These snippets of reminders to "choose happy" can be a great mini reminder to shift your thinking.

So—I encourage you to shift your negativity whenever you find yourself swimming around in it by arguing the opposite.